


The Gilded Cage

by Eternal_Love_Song



Category: Bishoujo Senshi Sailor Moon | Pretty Guardian Sailor Moon
Genre: Angst, Crystal Tokyo Era, Cutting, F/M, Future Fic, Hurt/Comfort, Introspection, Self-Destruction, Self-Harm, Unhealthy Coping Mechanisms, Unhealthy Relationships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-10-03
Updated: 2016-10-03
Packaged: 2018-08-19 09:35:11
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,502
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8200250
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Eternal_Love_Song/pseuds/Eternal_Love_Song
Summary: The people of Crystal Tokyo were sick.It wasn't a physical illness. At least, Serenity didn't think so. Something was wrong with them, though. Only she and Endymion seemed to notice, however.There was always someone watching her. Always a crowd, always a court. As queen, it was her duty to give her people what they needed of her.





	

All eyes were upon her.

Neo Queen Serenity had a soft smile on her face as Endymion led her in a dance. There was always someone watching her. Always a crowd, always a court, always a man or maiden that wanted just a glimpse of her; just wanted a word. The smile that she wore was a small, regal thing that came to her face out of habit more than emotion. Happy people smiled and everyone around her was happy, thus it was required that she be happy.

She was not. As queen, however, it was her duty to give her people what they needed of her.

She no longer had to think about her movements as Endymion led her in their dance. They had done so often enough that she could rely entirely upon muscle memory. The dances were not always the same, but she was used to the rhythm of him by now. The motions that meant he would dip her, the cue for her to spin, it had all become second nature to her now. The eyes that watched her, the wall of smiles that surrounded her, the whispers and complacency, it was all second nature to her now. That didn't mean that she wasn't tired of it, though.

The kingdom, the palace, it had all become a cage to her. A world of gilt and glitz that was devoid of anything underneath. Sometimes Endymion was also a cage to her, sometimes he was simply another bird beside her in the cage. Regardless, she was little more than a song bird to the people of Crystal Tokyo. They needed her to sing and crowded around her every morning, every night, just to see the pretty bird, and hear her sing, and call her beautiful. Just to love her as they wished her to be loved and to keep her as they wished her to be kept. Keeping her locked away so that her wings could never spread far enough for her to reach the sky.

The dances came to a halt, but the music carried on. She did not think that the music ever stopped when she was in her ballroom. Something to prompt the bird to sing, perhaps? Compliments rained down on all sides of her and Endymion accepted them with distant politeness. Finally, he turned to her and questioned softly, "Shall we return to our room, my queen?"

She smiled at this with more sincerity than her expression had previously contained. It was the fastest way they could get out of sight, being alone with each other. One of the few times that no one would beg of them another dance, or ask of them another task. _Was he the cage or the bird?_ She didn't always know. Whether he was saving her or keeping her to himself didn't matter at the moment, though, and she answered quickly. "Yes. Let us go."

He lead her away at a leisurely pace, one that was elegant and graceful as befit the King and Queen of Earth. She wished she could run. It had been so long since she had done so. She felt as if she might turn to crystal, as if she would become as stiff as everything around her. She wanted to run or even to fight, as she once had. But her motions and movements were all slow and elegant, trained and graceful. Anytime she thought that she might slip, she had Endymion beside her, leading her, caging her.

"What shall we do?" He asked her as they walked down the corridor that lead to their chambers. The halls here were glass, giving sight to the gardens on either side. She had been excited when they'd first had the idea, awed by the beauty that she would be so lucky to gaze upon. Now all she thought was that she was trapped by the potential onlookers that watched the Queen and King retreating to their solitude.

What should they do? It was a good question. She didn't have an answer prepared. What did one do when they were unable to move? When they were stuck? Trapped? She stopped herself from sighing and answered him just as softly as he had asked, "Do you have a desire, Endymion?"

"Just one," he said in a whisper. He did not say more and she felt very frustrated with such an answer. It could wait, though, if she were to question him further. They were almost to their rooms.

The space they claimed was something of a separate wing to the palace. There was a bed and a bath, of course, but there were also two separate rooms that were claimed by each of them. The large center room could be a common room and a bedroom in it's own right, it was so large, with a large bath attached to it. The separate rooms were on opposite sides of one another, with doors that lead to the outside gardens. Servants had been forbidden to enter their rooms since the beginning, so their bed chambers were a mystery to all. Serenity was grateful that something could be. She hated feeling watched all the time.

As soon as they entered, Endymion released her. He moved away from her as if she were poison, moving quickly to the area of their chambers that was more akin to a common room. There was a large couch, big enough that they could both lay down head to toe and still have room for a person to sit in-between them; there was a wide book case that sat before it, almost like a mini wall, and a table beside it. On the opposite side of the room there were desk and drawers that were mostly used for politicking and the like. Lately, they both avoided that corner of the room like it was the plague.

Serenity watched Endymion as he stood behind the couch, rapidly throwing off his cape and mask, unbuttoning his shirt and tossing that aside, then his shoes were also cast off. A pile of pale cloth was soon pooled on the floor. It didn't seem to be enough for Endymion, however, who looked at the pile of clothing as if he hated it. She glided across the room slowly, the cautious movements so ingrained in her that she did not truly think to cast them aside without urgency, and went to a dresser towards the back of the room that was sectioned off as the bedroom. She retrieved an armful of darkly colored silk and carried it over to Endymion, who had since cast off his pants and stared hatefully into the pile of clothing. Without word, she began to drape the dark colors over him, loosely looping them about his arms and torso. His hands went to her dress and she held still as he banished the pale fabric from her body. Once that was done, he crumbled slowly to the floor and she draped herself in a darkly colored gown.

"The lights..." He said softly. She nodded to him and went dim the lights and cover the windows.

Endymion was no longer fond of light. Not light colored things or the light colored palace and sometimes not even her. It was one of the king's vices. The light made him feel strangled and suffocated. When it first started to wear on them--when it started to become too much for them to keep inside--they had spoken about it. The vices. Their secret songs, as she thought of them. What the caged birds held in their hearts. Sometimes it was worse than others. Some vices worse than others.

She looked at him again once the room had become darkened. He looked pained... and weak. Endymion was very ashamed of this particular weakness, she knew. At times, she would still try to comfort him, but this was not one of those times. This was not one of those days. This day she felt... numb. The feeling could last for days if she let it. Another reason she was afraid that she might turn to crystal and become one more fixture to the palace. It wouldn't have much bearing on how she was loved, she suspected, or how she was worshiped. She stood still, watching Endymion. He didn't like his weakness, but there wasn't much more he could do. He denied the impulses when they were in public, so what more could be asked?

"Serenity," he called softly. "Bring me a glass?"

There was a cabinet that held wine, champagne, and drinking glasses. She went there and retrieved a glass for him. He motioned her down to his level and she crouched before him, holding out the glass. Endymion reached out and held his hands around her that cupped the glass, then he pushed them together until the glass shattered in her palm. Serenity gasped as the glass was pushed into her hands, blood seeping from the wounds.

"Wake up," he told her. He held her hands together for a bit longer, pushing tighter and she winced at the pain. She pulled her hands apart and watched as the blood seeped down her pale arms. Slowly, she reached out to him.

"Endymion," she whispered as she pressed her palms into his chest. She pressed glass more deeply into herself as well as pushing a few stray shards into him, painting him with her blood. "It's so quiet in here," she said softly.

"Then speak up!" He told her, making his voice louder as he spoke. She opened her mouth, but ended up just shaking her head. "Speak up!" He said louder, but he didn't have it in him to yell. Not in this quiet place, this silent palace where no one raised their voice or shouted, where any abnormal behavior would be noticed quickly and heavily commented upon. He took her hands in his own and grabbed her palms tightly, making her cry out in pain. He winced as well, but only held tighter. More blood escaped her and he angled her arms so that it ran onto him. Blood was color and Endymion could get... caught up in the sight of it. But she didn't fight it. Even if the sound was no more than her short cries of pain, the abnormality of it was almost therapeutic to her.

The injuries didn't matter. Endymion could heal them with the golden crystal. He'd become quite efficient at it, they had found, and they also had the ability to call upon Mercury, if they wanted. She had become an efficient doctor, though her duties had her more involved with lab work.

Before too long passed, Endymion released her and they both sat still on the floor. Endymion's eyes were watching the trails of blood that ran over his skin. He had tried before to wear something dark, something bright or loud, but the scrutiny wasn't worth it. He was still trapped between these colorless wall, everyone constantly commenting on how well the pale colors of his usual attire suited him, on how well he and his queen suited each other. Conversely, no one was silent when he had sought change. Not a sentence had begun without making note of the change, no conversation could go on without a mention that light colors suited him so much better, he couldn't walk anywhere without whispers wondering what was wrong or why the change. And time had not caused them to cease. Not days after, not weeks, not months, until eventually he simply gave up and dawned his usual garb.

"Endymion," she said softly. "What do you wish me to do?" She asked, holding her hands to indicate her injuries. Some injuries he would take care of right away, just to be certain that she did not suffer much damage, but small things like this he did not always deal with. He made a dismissive gesture at her, signaling that he did not wish to heal her. That was fine. Mercury would take care of her.

**II.**

  
"I'm sorry to trouble you with this," Serenity said, eyes focused on her hand as Mercury leaned over it, watching as the senshi slowly pulled out the glass.

"It's no problem," Mercury answered. "I'm surprised that things like this still happen. Whenever I see you, it's like you don't even touch the ground anymore when you walk, you move so gracefully."

"Some things never change," Serenity said. She wanted to put some of her old lightheartedness into it, but she couldn't manage. It came out sounding... just like everything else she said lately, softly and without infliction or personality. Most people didn't notice. Mercury noticed. She spared a look at Serenity, but mostly kept her eyes focused on extracting the glass shards from her queen’s hand. Silence reigned for a few minutes before Serenity spoke again. "Mercury... have you... gotten further in your research?"

More silence followed that. After a minute or so, Mercury answered in a professional tone. "No. I can't seem to find anything like what you described."

"Oh. I see." Serenity's answer was sullen.

* * *

 

The people of Crystal Tokyo were sick.

It wasn't a physical illness. At least, Serenity didn't think so. Something was wrong with them, though. Only she and Endymion seemed to notice, however.

Actually, she wasn't sure if Endymion did notice. He was being broken down trying to deal with the effects of it, though, so even if he didn't notice, he was equally burdened.

 _Almost_ equally burdened.

No one could be more burdened than she was because she had caused the change in the people of Crystal Tokyo.

She had thought that it would be the right thing to do. All the darkness she had faced, all the evil that had come to plague Earth had always been driven off by the Ginzuishou. She had healed with the crystal, resurrected with it, restored with it. If it could be a tool for fighting, it could be a shield as well. There would be no more incidents of mind control, little disease and less death, if only she could use it as a shield before there was ever need to use it as a sword.

It had really been that last catastrophe that had decided it.

When the cold had hit, and it had hit hard, not many people could make it. Faster and faster, in larger and larger quantities, people started to fall prey to the it. She couldn't stand it. She and the senshi were immune, Endymion and Luna and Artemis seemed able to hold up against it, but around them, everyone was dying off one by one. The senshi had tried to help, tried to pool their energy into a forcefield that surrounded the city. It worked, but it wouldn't last forever and the storm was only worsening and she couldn't change the weather.

Endymion was able to use his power, his connection with the Earth, in order to restore vitality to the people closest to the edge. It quickly began to take it tool on him, though. The senshi began to wear thin, too, perhaps just as quickly. They had gotten stronger, but it was a whole city. And Endymion only got worse and worse as the world became buried in ice and snow.

Finally, she couldn't take it anymore.

She made a wish on the Ginzuishou.

She had nearly died and Endymion nearly died with her. Or perhaps they did die. Or perhaps they had finally... woken up. Usagi and Mamoru, had _'died'_ and Serenity and Endymion had _'woken up.'_

She had protected the city, woven a protective barrier around it that caused all the ice and snow to melt around it and banished the cold that was within reach along with it. Endymion had given most of his life force to keep her alive, effectively placing him on the verge of death alongside her. The senshi tried to lend their power, but that only helped her shield. It didn't affect her life.

She didn't die. When she had woken up, she knew something for a fact. The people of Tokyo, the people of Earth, would not be able to survive much longer. Not in mass. Maybe a few would go on, but her power hadn't stopped the cold and the storm, if it could be called by such a tame title, was still raging strong. And the only thing she had that could save them was the Ginzuishou. And she told them all, vehemently refusing any objections, what she intended to do.

And Mars was furious, raging about how she had already died and it was too dangerous; Mercury was going over the logistics of whether or not it would work and what the side effects would be; Jupiter was trying to stop Mars' yelling and asking Endymion to talk some sense into her and asking Mercury if she really thought this was a good idea and practically pleading with the water senshi to use logic to talk the idea down instead of up; and Venus... she just looked on the scene quietly for a time before whispering.  
  
_"So this is it?" Venus asked no one in particular. "It's... It's finally time."_

_"What are you talking about?" Jupiter asked. She sounded angry, but they all knew she was just frustrated. She worried about her. They all were._

_"Usagi is... she's suppose to become queen," Venus whispered softly. "It's... it's finally time."_

_Mercury became quiet. Mars... Mars got louder. "What do you mean it's time! It can't be! Usagi isn't ready to... What makes you think..." The fire senshi was so upset she couldn't find her words anymore._

_"Pluto told us that it would be a big event, even if she didn't tell us what that event would be," Mamoru said softly. He looked into her eyes, his hand firmly clasped in her own._

_Jupiter interrupted the moment. "What are you saying? You can't know that!" Jupiter sounded almost desperate._

_"Look around you, Makoto!" Venus yelled. "This... This is the end. It's practically another ice age! The population all over the world is dropping and it's only getting colder. Most already don't think the human race will survive. Not as a whole. A few stragglers here and there and that's all. Maybe not even that. Usagi... She's the messiah. This is what she does that leads to her being queen. She saves the world... again. Not from monsters or darkness, from it's own natural end."_

_Mercury began typing rapidly into her computer. "It's true that all the predictions have been quite bleak and estimations don't think that things are going to go well, but no one really places stock in predictions that the world's going to--"_

_"This isn't a prediction." Mamoru spoke up quietly. "It's a reality. All around us the world is growing colder and there's no cause but nature. I can feel it. Everyday something inside me grows colder and colder, and I know that if it doesn't stop... I'll die. I'll freeze and the Earth will freeze along with it. It wouldn't be the first time the Earth has frozen over. And millions of people have already died from it."_

_"We can't protect them all," Mars said angrily, but her voice was quiet and tears were in her eyes._

_"So are you saying we shouldn't protect any of them?" Venus asked._

_"No, but--"_

_"I'm doing it," She told them. "I won't let anybody die if I have the power to save them."_

_"Are you sure about this?" He asked her quietly. "There won't be any going back." He stared intently into her eyes, trying to convey several things to her at once without having to use words. His expression was very serious, sadness and fear in his eyes, but his face was set in a very determined way. Whatever she chose, he would stand beside her. He would support her. But she had to consider all the possibilities first._

_She smiled at him and nodded, responding just as softly. "I have to do this," She told him. "I could never live with myself if I let so many people die."_

_They all paused, letting the silence settle. Mercury began to type more rapidly on her computer. "Your theory actually seems sound, Usagi. The sailor crystals seem to be protecting us, so there's no reason why it can't do the same for others... The Ginzuishou was able to revive everyone before, so it should be a simple enough matter to... but... hmm..." She typed more as she thought, letting her words trail off and be forgotten._

_"What if..." Mars began quietly. "What if... you put everyone to sleep... but no one is able to wake up? What if... you don't wake up?"_

_Serenity's expression softened as she looked at the fire senshi, tears in her downcast eyes, her face clearly fighting with whether or not to express the distress and worry that plagued her. "Rei." Serenity called to her, waiting until her eye finally lifted before she continued. "Everyone will wake up. I promise."_

_"And you?" Mars asked her, even closer to bursting into tears. She couldn't stop the sincerity of her worry from shining through. "Will you wake up, too?"_

_"Yes." Serenity answered her. "I promise, I will wake up to."_

_And she fell onto her knees and hugged Serenity. She cried silently, her body shaking with fear that she wouldn't be able to keep her promise. And Mamoru's hand tightened around hers, perhaps shaking just a bit, as well. And Venus stared up at the sky, letting the tears trail down her cheek, choosing to discard her senshi self for what they all knew would be one of the last times. And Jupiter sank into the snow beside them, moving to embrace Mars and Serenity as Mercury continued typing away._

_The forcefield placed around Tokyo held, the storm didn't penetrate it._

_A few days later, once she was certain that she was at full strength, she wrapped a protective field around everyone on Earth. And everyone feel asleep for a very long time._

_Eventually, the Ginzuishou woke her from such a hibernation. Then she woke up everyone else._

* * *

  
This was not what Serenity had done wrong.

What Serenity had done wrong came after everyone woke up. After Tokyo was released from the barrier that she hadn't expected to hold the entire time they slept, after others had come to the city and after she had discovered that she could no longer become a senshi.

It was guided by equal parts fear and a general desire for safety, but she hadn't realized the first motive at the time. She wanted to further reinforce the people of Earth. Those that had found their way into her city, at least. They had been wrapped in a protective barrier of her power during the long years that they all lay sleeping and they had all faired so well. Certainly, being further bathed in such power would only serve to further heal, to further help. One by one, on the condition of her rule and of remaining in her city, she washed each person in her power.

That she should not have done.

It was a wish she should never have made. If it was the fault of a wish at all and not just the natural reaction to the Ginzuishou that the people of Earth were destined to have. Hadn't it been forbidden to have contact with Earth during the Silver Millennium? Could it have been for this exact reason and she just never knew because love and jealousy had provided a quick hurdle into death?

She didn't know precisely what was wrong, only that something very much was.

Yes, there little death and no disease. Yes, people were happy. Happier, even. But that was part of the problem. They... they needed her. They needed the light and her presence. They were all so soft spoken and kindly. No, it shouldn't have been bad. And how could she say that it was? But it did worry her. It scared her, a little, the radical change that had come over humanity. And yes, she radiated the power and they could all... perhaps they could feel it. Everyone would orient them themselves around her, and everyone would watch her so carefully all the time, and the small things had never been so important!

Perhaps it was nothing.

Perhaps it should have been nothing. But no one yelled or ran or fought anymore. Could it be only that these things did not happen when she was near? And if she changed, if Endymion changed, no would cease to mention it until the change was gone. Bright colors, dark colors, would cause a rise in whispers for months if it persisted. No one did anything... but... certainly it wasn't suppose to be this way! She wasn't really suppose to live in a crystal town, in a glass palace, where no one would shout or throw stones and where they watched their queen... obsessively. Surely it wasn't really just all in her mind.

She had told Mercury about her worries in the beginning and Mercury had provided her with all the counter arguments that she was now providing for herself. Mercury had looked into it, but she said that she didn't find anything wrong. Mercury didn't act like the others in Crystal Tokyo. None of the senshi did. But did no one else really see it? Was it really just... all in her head? All in Endymion's head?

Serenity couldn't think so.

"I'm all done, Serenity," Mercury told her.

"Thank you," Serenity answered.

Then again, Mercury was so often in a lab caught up in her research of this sort or another, she didn't see what Serenity did. She wasn't the center of a gilded world.

Did her mother have this problem? The moon had been the center of the Silver Millennium. Did all things, given enough time and exposure, orient around the Ginzuishou? Dark forces sought it out, normal people, before this began, recognized it in her. Good, they thought. Pure.

This power that could raise cities and empires and hold together a solar system in peace; that could restore, revive, and purify; that was the amplifier or will and granter of wishes; Was it a blessing? Or was it merely a curse wearing an elaborate disguise? And how could she ever know?

* * *

 

**III.**

  
Peace was not as peaceful as Serenity had always imagined it to be. It was not calm, nor free of stress, and certainly not devoid of surprises. They still had to worry about food, the restoration of the farther plains of Earth, and there was a problem of her own creation.

It had come as an immense surprise the first time the people of Nemesis had sought to contact her. The banished people had kept to themselves for decades and longer, harboring an anger and resentment that she rather envied them. But when they did reach out to her, it was out of pure desperation. The barren rock that she had banished her dissenters to was not flourishing. It was cold and resistant to much change. Crops barely grew, they had little food, few resources, and were barely scrapping by.

It was to her grave shame and brightest hope that she and Endymion had answered their plea. She was desperate for a people not altered by her crystal, frightened for and of them, shamed by the actions she had taken against them. And when the correspondences and pleas had reached the point where they needed to set foot onto the planet, assess what damage they needed to correct, Endymion had taken her hand gently within his own. “Shall we endure yet another trial together, my queen?”

It was a comfort, of a sort. It was a trap. They were a constant reminder to the other of their trials within their own kingdom and she resented not being able to escape him, to escape this place. It was a plea not to abandon him among the caging walls of the palace. It was a hand of camaraderie, that she may not have to walk alone among what were certainly hostile forces. And, when he smiled at her, forced and grim and gentle, it was an admission that if they were alone, either of them, they may try to run. She would not return from her jaunt to the furthest planet, or he would not be waiting when she did.

Serenity squeezed his hand. A promise, a lock, a chain. _You are bound to me, we are in this together, you shall not escape, I won’t let you go._ It was as wicked as it had ever been love when she returned his smile with a soft one of her own, nothing of sincerity behind it. “Yes, my king, together.”

The planet had been watched since the people were banished there. By the attentive eyes of the outer senshi who remained in their lonely castles as the watchful sentries of the solar system they were meant to be. Nemesis was ever watched. That was only as far as security, however, to be certain those banished did not attempt to strike out at those that had wronged them. It was not done in the interest of Nemesis and that was one more thing that hung heavy on Serenity’s heart when she let it.

It was a secret that she told none of the senshi, her contact with the cold, bitter planet. She was too selfish to give up the opportunity for escape, the chance at escaping the eyes on her. Occasionally, Endymion would tease, “This could be the trip we do not return from. The outers would not stop us. We could continue on, past Nemesis, and never look back.”

She would hold to his hand, grip breakingly tight. She was afraid of her own temptation to take the offer and his own seriousness in making it--both of their seriousness when they contemplated running from the cage that they were in. Sometimes, on the occasion that Endymion made that suggestion, Saturn would escort them to their destination, or otherwise send word that reached them in an eerily timely manner. Never anything to suggest that the reason for the words was meant to correlate to the time it was received, never any admonishments or pleas, nothing to indicate that the senshi of silence was aware of their desire, but it still gave them somber pause. Chains and bars everywhere, locks and cages, and they would quiet and resign to playing their roles as they were meant, resisting the desperate desire to struggle that never resulted in any peace.

The first trip had been a shock. The planet of Nemesis was like a balm and a lash all in one. It struck her deeply to see the bareness of the planet, the lifelessness she had sentenced these people to endure. At the same time, it was glorious, after the pristine halls of her own palace, to wander the dark atmosphere. She could feel the utter relief in Endymion at the difference. The absence of light, of the pale and drained colors he had so come to hate. They were all absent here. There was a dark and harsh look to the palace, to the people. It was devastating and lovely in the worst of the ways. She wanted to cry for the relief she felt in this place, as well the pure shame.

After her initial impression, it was almost a slap in the face to meet the prince of Nemesis. Possessed of the same harshness that all on Nemesis seemed to have adapted, with the stark black inverted moon emblazoned on his head, yet dressed and draped in the purest of white, with silver strands of hair that looked as if they spun from all the light the planet lacked. And she had so many more dealings with the prince than the king, as the former was able to at least pretend at civility, as if it was not completely her doing that he and his people were condemned as they were.

And she was never spared eyes on that planet, either. The people were often inclined to look away from her, but she always caught that brief look of hate and desperate need, that they condemned her, but realized that was their only hope of salvation.

And so she and Endymion had begun siphoning their resources to Nemesis, as covertly as they could so that they would never have to broke the issue with the senshi or hear the whispers of the people. In that way, they were rather like rulers of two planets, the second a dark secret they kept all to themselves. A secret prison, but no less than the one they suffered through daily. The bars were gilded over and she knew not how to escape.


End file.
